Friday, September 29, 2006Friday Coffeehouse: Dose me up please!
Ellie here, my first post since Dominic was born (the others were made before his birth and saved to be put up by Sia). Sia is up here with me this week... generous with her time and energy to help me out when I really needed it.
Helping women out after the birth of a child is such an important thing! Other cultures have us so far beat in this regard... in Nigeria for example a woman has someone with her for 6 weeks post-partum! Imagine! But our culture is such one that expects women to be able to do everything and be everything to everyone. Couple that with the fact that many families don't live close to their relatives anymore and you have conditions for one isolated-feeling mama!
I've been struggling a bit with the "Baby Blues" with this little man, plus I came down with a terrible infection that had me completely out of commission for a couple days. This with the sleepless nights and physical post-partum pains has been of course challenging for me. And most of all... I miss my mother like never before. She lives 5 hours away and has a hard time making it up here with how busy her life is.
And so having Sia around has been tremendously helpful. I say this because I am such a firm believer in offering new mothers as much support as possible. I know you Santa Paulers out there have a great dinner chain for the mamas in your area... I wish everyone would do this. And just taking the kids for a walk or offering to hold the baby while mom eats... what a treat!
With three kids, I have a lot of general thoughts on motherhood now but mostly I just wanted to put a plug in for all of us to give a little bit more of ourselves to new mothers. Even moms you don't know well!! Whenever I see a newborn in my parish, I try to introduce myself to the mom if I don't know her and offer to bring a meal... which as manners dictate, she tries to politely refuse. But you have to be persistant with those of us who like to pretend we can handle everything!! INSIST! Just ask what day works best... and if their are any allergies to worry about. Make it impossible to say "No."
This is our little way of imitating the Blessed Mother who gave so generously of her time and energy (while pregnant herself!) to her cousin Elizabeth.
So, in order to lamely tie this into a Friday Coffeehouse post, I'll say "Pour me another cup," because the days are long and trying right now. And God is generous in the graces He allows to flow through such days.
-Ellie, Oak Harbor: WA